Snarf (snärf): A humorous occurrence and/or person, specifically one relating to the world of sport

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The Sporting Snarf is a website dedicated to the enjoyable, humorous, and nuanced aspects of the sporting and (to a lesser extent) pop-culture world. We attempt to touch upon (in varying degrees of print/video length) engaging topics which are not discussed nearly enough. We'd love for you to give us your perspective, network, and participate regularly. But if you'd just like to join in on the mob-mentality and get all sanctimonious on a particular sports figure -- head on over to ESPN.com. (Mickey Mouse welcomes you.) Or you can keep it real with us.

25 Oldschool Father’s Day Gems

“Forgot About Bush”
Submitted on 2011/03/09 at 9:17 AM
“and 2 years later he’s still cleaning up the eight year dump bush and co. took in my living room. How can America ignore that smell? Don’t step up if you won’t help clean up, you’ll only get in the way of the working man.”

“Lost Franchise”
Submitted on 2011/04/26 at 7:43 AM
“Purple and Gold looking mighty OLD.”

“Reilly knows his ball… Not!”
Submitted on 2011/04/22 at 1:36 PM
“I heard the same old schoolboy drivel when he would dis the red wings only to have to eat his words…He’s always dished it out but he cannot take it…boo hoo,boo hoo….. It’s all that high altitude that’s turned him 98% weasel.”

“RIP Big Al”
Submitted on 2011/10/09 at 1:44 AM
“…………………this man was awesome with the talent he brought and the caliber of coaching he inspired…………the Silver and Black attack…….the deep threat of sticky fingers warren wells and the punishing defense that only a steeler could appreciate……..who are these guys…..nothing but some of your best football memories…………..you are the one who made it all happen Al.”

“Green Bay Packers Super Bowl Win Celebrated By G’s”
Submitted on 2011/08/28 at 11:41 PM
“The Money man will fight the pac-man when the money is right and the blood sample is ample!”

“.330, 44, 139″
Submitted on 2012/10/05 at 12:41 AM
“Hey Tiger Fans!………………………..TRIPLE CROWN…………….not just for horse racing anymore!”

“Mitt Romney: World’s Biggest Asshole”
Submitted on 2012/09/25 at 2:42 PM
“……………………Jesus Mitt, the dude is a soldier who picked up a rifle and advanced!!!!!better check in with Planet Kolob Mitt……… maybe your thoughts will change with the latest update………remember?……… your church barred black people until 1977 when all of sudden, this just in from upstairs……….Black people are ok now!……check it out Mitt, it might allow you to treat a whole segment of Humanity more humanely!”

“Clippers End Miraculous Season”
Submitted on 2013/05/04 at 11:41 AM
“…………………….these Clippers are here to stay!………….but unless you want to descend into the contrived world of the WWE how about policing up your playoff staff……..30 free throw attempts in the first half?……forearms to the face while horizontal on the floor?…………..this was the basketball version of Leatherheads!!!………..even Hockey realized this when all their top seeds were clutched and grabbed out of the first round………eventually Stern will just line everyone up and kick them in the nuts until last man standing.”

“Hey Dad, Catch!”
Submitted on 2014/05/28 at 12:20 PM
“………….how many times did they shag fly balls at the park never knowing it was practice for the future……….that’s got to be a dream come true and an over the shoulder catch to boot!”

“What Works? By Eric Ralph”
Submitted on 2012/10/24 at 5:55 PM
“………….this article exposes the fraud of the Republican Party……….to subdue education of the people is a crime and the eventual death sentence for free society…………..who is helping people and who is embellishing himself?…….to deny the science of Global Warming, the care of Human Body, the value of our own people is a mantra of a demigod and a Dictator………oldschool stands behind Obama because I have already heard the disgusting, ignorant, elitist rhetoric of the 50′s white man and have found him to be a major league ass-hole with all the sincerity of a pubic louse…………..let’s stop the retreat to the dark ages…………….. tell these “Republicans”……………no!”

“Ambassador Worm”
Submitted on 2013/03/04 at 8:10 PM
“…………….. what’s next? …………………NASCAR drives the hospital ship?”

“1984??”
Submitted on 2012/12/15 at 10:38 PM
“…………….what if I’m scratching my butt……will I see an ad for Gold Bond?”

“Up All Night? No Problem for Motown”
Submitted on 2013/05/03 at 12:10 PM
“……..Tigers earned every bit of this one……..I fell asleep after we were thrown out at home in the 11th but kept my Tiger’s jersey on!………….How many x-tra inning games have we played already?…………..and the Wings look like a much higher seed with the way they came out on fire to start all three periods……..and of course Magic Jim stopping point blank shots!!……again.”

“Fuck Justin Amash”
Submitted on 2014/03/02 at 6:19 PM
“……..take it from oldschool, I’ve seen his type since the 50′s…..a junior boy who just got to congress………telling us about cost but he hasn’t missed a meal in his life…..You were crappin in your pants 30 years after Medicare began…..how dare you ponce around and preach fear to the AARP community.”

“Looks Like Loyer Indeed Was Prematurely Praised”
Submitted on 2014/03/12 at 10:23 PM
“….this coach is flat out not prepared…….we are starting the 1st period lost….battle back by half-time but start the second half slow…I cannot believe that Mo is worse than this guy… the less Loyer says the better they will respond….. it’s like watching a rookie jockey whip a racehorse instead of just ride…please get theses guys a real coach.”

“Heat & Grizzlies Advance to Conference Finals, Respectively”
Submitted on 2013/05/16 at 1:56 PM
“…………………..us Pistons fans have been angling for some company……..we’ve been fishin’ for weeks and rented the boat months ago!”

“Three-Year Anniversary, TheSportingSnarf!”
Submitted on 2014/02/06 at 9:06 PM
“…….. it’s a tribute to a volume of work everyday…. I have the easy part….. to be able to participate is an opportunity to be relevant…… but someone has to cut the path to it……. congratulations and Happy 3rd Anniversary to the Sporting Snarf and many more!”

“Our Thoughts and Prayers Are with You, Grandville”
Submitted on 2014/03/08 at 1:26 PM
“………..this is how you feel sports transcend the moment………… people sharing the load…. all taking a hand hold and lifting the weight….. electing to play to honor your friend and teammate…………showing how people are more important than winning .. celebrating the life of your opponent with your opponent………hats off to young snarf and all involved for bringing focus that the sports blanket can cover all.”

“Northwestern Wildcats Football Takes Giant Step for College Athletes”
Submitted on 2014/03/27 at 1:24 PM
“………………this is epic….. student athletes make money……. they share in the profits…….this should end the modern day sharecropping of students …and expose the system of wealth that is generated….. but not shared.”

“Fuck Donald Sterling”
Submitted on 2014/04/28 at 12:05 PM
“…. Sterling’s confident and arrogant words of racism shows no respect for anyone in the human race…….he is not responsible for anything about the NBA ……this racism has been shoved down so low that some people don’t think it exists anymore…..wrong …..stop this now…take that team away from him and give the Team the Coach and Fans someone as worthy as them.”

“Ridiculous Ending Spoils Strong Game Five for Clippers”
Submitted on 2014/05/15 at 2:05 PM
“the refs drew a cartoon window and the Thunder escaped through it.”

“Fan Calls College Basketball Player ‘N’ Word”
Submitted on 2014/02/10 at 5:45 PM
“……… this type of fan is a disgrace to my entire generation and why is this not front page news…a sanctimonious self-righteous tub of puss who travels hundreds of miles to vomit his hate and prejudice under the cowardly mask of OSU team spirit and the university and its fans are swimming in it!….how can you teach sportsmanship, respect and unity in this arena of human scum …….what are you gonna do about it OSU?………put out a statement condemning what fans like this do or start bring your own pillow case night!”

“Super Bowl 2013 National Anthems”
Submitted on 2013/05/27 at 1:30 PM
“………………Keys can do it all……….write, compose, play, sing……..all while bathing you in her soothing updraft of emotion…………and how about Jennifer with those kids ………how do we not honor those kids with our love and protection……..I believe that the pen is still mightier than the sword………..but it seems to be no match for a gun right now…………is that how were going to let it be?”

“Oneida Nation Seeks Redskins Name Change”
Submitted on 2013/11/01 at 12:02 PM
“…………….the power of this change starts right now in the new forest of fans that emerges……….much like voting is the civic responsibility of effecting Politics, the social responsibility of the people is to stop fueling the 9 Billion dollar bigot machine by using economic power…..don’t buy their gear and tell your parents not to buy you any!!…….in time the old school owners and fans will fade away and carry their bigoted jerseys and gear to the grave………only apathy can reinfect the new Trees…….and then you’ll have to start all over……that’s how it’s gotten this far.”

“Our Ballpark”
Submitted on 2014/01/04 at 12:03 PM
“…………………..this was like watching your house go up in flames………..it is the gathering point for all who love the sport and we waited for years to enjoy it……..you can’t stop it now…………it’s sad, but we will use this as an opportunity to rebuild and come back better…….see you in the spring………..Go Whitecaps!”

Thanks, dad. Happy Father’s Day!

2 Comments

  1. oldschool's Gravatar oldschool
    June 15, 2014    

    ………. this has always been a favorite Day…..may men everywhere enjoy the life and times of being Dad…I know I have…thank-you for letting me be that guy!

    • Eric Ralph's Gravatar Eric Ralph
      June 15, 2014    

      You earned it!

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“Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.”

— Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

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