Snarf (snärf): A humorous occurrence and/or person, specifically one relating to the world of sport

Grand Rapids FTW

After successfully fulfilling our Ralph destiny and watching the Grand Rapids Griffins hoist the Calder Cup into our arena’s sky for all to see – I couldn’t feel better.

I had had enough. Trump. New England. Golden State. How many more slack-jawed faggots would we all have to watch wear the crown? GR trailed 1-0. 2-1. 3-2. When we finally took a 4-3 lead with seven minutes to go, it was either we protect this HO– USE OR DIE TRYING.

Ask my brother, Ethan, who bought the tickets as a birthday present for me (which is in November! and I waited until now to cash in the tickets!): I yelled louder than I ever have in my life. For that final stretch, the sweat beading down my body only amused me as I let the last of the tequila do the work.

I held onto Ethan for dear life during those final plays – but we held on & confetti exploded in the same place I’ve watched hundreds of games, forcing snarf tears to gush over my jersey. I really tried to soak it in, looking around at my ten thousand fellow Michiganders, all of us hugging like family. I will remember that moment forever…

I needed that one. My brother recently moved in, and once again sports cemented (at least in my head) more vindication for a Midwest family always struggling to survive.

I LOVE MY CITY. And to have that moment with my brother 16 years after we watched the Arena Bowl Champions in that same spot sure felt like a dream come true.


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