Brad Ausmus and I do not think alike. Unless it’s just the way Big Cat and our hitters approach the game – not working the count, swinging at the first fastball they see. Personally, I do not enjoy watching the 2016 Detroit Tiger offensive style. And it’s only May. Unless Ausmus is dismissed for Kirk Gibson, someone with a balanced approach to baseball, this unbearable brand will keep trending on.

From the 1st pitch, we had a problem. Ian Kinsler quickly got down 0-2 and swung in the dirt. Do you see very many other leadoff hitters with 10 home runs? Ausmus is maximizing power at the top sans speed and sacrificing. Cameron Maybin is being squandered at the #7 hole despite his natural leadoff ability. Next up, J.D. Martinez. He worked it 2-2, but also struck out. He’s a born #3/#4 hole slugger who fits 5th in Detroit behind Big Cat and Victor Martinez.

Right away on the broadcast, Gibson mentions if they crowded the plate they’d see these pitches. He was dismissively questioned by the clown Impemba. How fucking stupid are we? This guy is right there, loves us, and is qualified, so what are we waiting for? We were 4/22 with runners in scoring position this series, while Oakland finished 8/19. It’s fundamental baseball – Ausmus is lacking a manager’s mentality as a young docile do-nothing stand-there snarf.

Big Cat struck out also to begin the game. Ever since Prince Fielder was traded, he stopped working the walk. He used to relish letting Fielder do the dirty work; it’s not like V can’t clean-up, but they already had a thing going. Don’t fuck with swagger. He won back-to-back MVPs with Fielder on deck including the first triple crown in decades. Good thing we traded our hometown boy…

We had base runners early but only cashed them in the hard way. Sometimes we just seem like excitable boys on the basepaths. We get that first man on and just strand him like a roll-less G on the toilet. And speaking of cans, it came down to two two-out hits that 2nd inning, the latter by “The Can,” to plate our first run. ALWAYS the hard way with two outs… it’s not that we don’t have success swinging, but as a team, when we work it together, we’re unstoppable. That’s how you win a World Series – no one in ’84 knocked in 100 runs or hit 35 homers and they whooped everyone’s ass! SMALL BALL OR DIE!

Meanwhile, Mike Pelfrey was in search (still) of his first win as a Tiger. He did well, but routinely struggled to finish – innings and batters. He recorded the first 2 outs of the game before surrendering two hits (no runs). He gave up a two-out hit in the 2nd (no outs). The 3rd inning was about the most frustrating thing I’ve ever seen. Michigan’s Rich Hill was walking guys – Kinsler started the inning with a base on balls, and J.D. went to 3-0, before we started fucking up. He swung at two in the dirt pitches instead of walking (like a home run is at all common), then took a pitch right on the edge for a lucky ball four. We do that a lot (Upton, Castellanos…) – swing at awful stuff then try and take one on the edge.

SO – it’s clear Hill is struggling with his command. Miguel Cabrera swings at the first pitch and hits into a double play. He seems to hate being walked and it’s hurting him and us massively.  Two outs, Kinsler at 3rd: V bailed us out (up 3-1) with an RBI single down the line. He was the only consistent bat. Seeing that inning live broke me.

Pelfrey really started to roll. He tossed three straight clean innings with strong defense behind him. But we refused to work Hill. Every inning up 2-0 we should have piled on, but we barely increased his pitch count. And it came back to haunt us…

(This is our scariest predicament: it seems we like swinging early in the count. This goes against every principle of baseball.)

The Tigers turned their first double play in the 6th, no on, two outs. Hit. Hit. Ground ball, easy out… error, Kinsler. 2,1 score, two on. Wild pitch. Walk. At 95 pitches, we failed to allow Pelfrey to free himself, and Justin Wilson gave up a two-run bloop single to Pigman Billy Butler. You could see him struggle with both two strikes and two outs to complete the at-bat, and a better manager never ever would find himself losing now 3-2.

Hill led off the 7th at 90 pitches, where Maybin worked a walk. He never should have outlasted Pelfrey. McCann pushed him past 100, then chased the 2-2 pitch in the dirt. Killing me… Jose Iglesias, ever so impatient, got out in one pitch after Hill left… and Kinsler struckout. I went and saw oldschool, bent and contorted looking like the disheveled mess we all currently reside in.

All our best players still batted in an eventual 4-2 loss. Honestly, I have no idea how to keep doing this.

With management this poor, offensive flow so bad, and bullpen usage so stagnant, maybe it’s intolerable to be a Tigers fan right now. This is SO EASY

SMALL BALL OR DIE

JUST — USE ME

Everyday, it’s the same. Super-heroes bailing out bad Brad with two outs and late inning heroics, but even as players, they prefer to swing, even if means striking out. And we always make the late innings stressful… and we’re probably not going to change.

So there continues to be one solution: FIRE AUSMUS, HIRE GIBSON. NOW. Or continue to play baseball in the only place hotter than summer ballparks: HELL.